Greg’s Blog

More Real Technical Support Calls

• Tech support: What kind of computer do you have?
  Female customer: A white one…
  
• Customer: Hi, this is Celine. I can’t get my diskette out.
  Tech support: Have you tried pushing the Button?
  Customer: Yes, sure, it’s really stuck.
  Tech support: That doesn’t sound good; I’ll make a note. Customer: No, wait a minute… I hadn’t inserted it yet… it’s still on my desk… sorry….
  
• Tech support: Click on the ‘my computer’ icon on to the left o f the screen.
  Customer: Your left or my left?
  
• Tech support: Good day. How may I help you?
  Male customer: Hello… I can’t print.
  Tech support: Would you click on “start” for me and…
  Customer: Listen pal; don’t start getting technical on me! I’m not Bill Gates.
  
• Customer: Hi, good afternoon, this is Martha, I can’t print. Every time I try, it says ‘Can’t find printer’. I’ve even lifted the printer and placed it in front of the monitor, but the computer still says he can’t find it…
  
• Customer: I have problems printing in red…
  Tech support: Do you have a color printer?
  Customer: Aaaah………………..thank you.
  
• Tech support: What’s on your monitor now, ma’am?
  Customer: A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me at the 7-11.
  
• Customer: My keyboard is not working anymore.
  Tech support: Are you sure it’s plugged into the computer?
  Customer: No. I can’t get behind the computer.
  Tech support: Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back.
  Customer:! OK
  Tech support: Did the keyboard come with you?
  Customer: Yes
  Tech support: That means the keyboard is not plugged in. Is there another keyboard?
  Customer: Yes, there’s another one here. Ah…that one does work…

• Tech support: Your password is the small letter “a” as in apple, a capital letter V as in Victor, the number 7.
  Customer: Is that 7 in capital letters?

• Customer: can’t get on the Internet.
  Tech support: Are you sure you used the right password?
  Customer: Yes, I’m sure. I saw my colleague do it.
  Tech support: Can you tell me what the password was?
  Customer: Five stars.

• Tech support: What anti-virus program do you use? Customer: Netscape. Tech support: That’s not an anti-virus program.
  Customer: Oh, sorry…Internet Explorer.
  
• Customer: I have a huge problem. A friend has placed a screen saver on my computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears.
  
• Tech support: How may I help you?
  Customer: I’m writing my first e-mail.
  Tech support: OK, and what seems to be the problem?
  Customer: Well, I have the letter ‘a’ in the address, but how do I get the circle around it?
  
• A woman customer called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer.
  Tech support: Are you running it under windows?
  Customer: “No, my desk is next to the door, but that is a good point. The man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window, and his printer is working fine.”

And last but not least…

• Tech support: “Okay Bob, let’s press the control and escape keys at the same time. That brings up a task list in the middle of the screen. Now type the letter “P” to bring up the Program Manager.” Customer: I don’t have a P.
  Tech support: On your keyboard, Bob.
  Customer: What do you mean?
  Tech support: “P”…..on your keyboard, Bob.
  Customer: I’M NOT GOING TO DO THAT!

Many of the things you can count, don’t count. Many of the things you can’t count, really count.

Albert Einstein.

One of our most fundamental rights as Americans is free speech and the right to free expression of ideas. We must never lose that, but it appears that civility has been replaced with out and out hatred as the above video shows. And we wonder why the best and brightest don’t run for public office.

Look for opportunities to make people feel important.

Never underestimate the influence of the people you have allowed into your life.

Having lived in the Midwest most of my life, I have seen my fair share of violent weather, but the last couple of years have been exceptionally bad as the above video can attest to.

He did it with all his heart, and prospered.

2 Chronicles 31:21 (KJV)

The most important handshake of your life will happen when your newborn infant’s tiny hand grabs hold of your index finger.

Anonymous

A new study suggests that a vitamin B12 deficiency can hasten mental decline. Previous research indicated the B12 and folic acid might help fend of Alzheimer’s disease. The new study indicated a lack of B12 could diminish cognitive function.

Sources of B12 include oysters,fish,meat,milk, and eggs.

Let your life be your sermon